It is 4:30 Saturday afternoon, and I finally have enough energy to sit up and type for a few minutes. I have completed my first week of chemotherapy. It could have been worse – I never did get nauseous. I suspect that is due to the saltines and strawberry fig newtons that I kept eating, as well as keeping water by my bed all the time. I never did have to take the “emergency” medication that they prescribed for me, which I consider a blessing.
Things certainly took a downturn on Thursday. I found it hard to open my eyes on Thursday. I couldn’t necessarily sleep, but I just couldn’t keep my eyes open. Friday I bounced back a bit, and although I was fatigued, I was lucid and able to participate in a good meeting at work.
Today is a different story. My legs feel like rubber, and my throat is very sore. My stomach feels like I have been doing sit ups. It hurts to swallow – I have had a lot of ice cream today (which is unusual for me, as I really don’t eat many sweets). Some things are starting to taste different – I couldn’t tell the difference between a Diet Coke and a Sprite. My head feels fuzzy – I find it difficult to concentrate. This is especially frustrating, as I can’t read or study anything since I can’t focus my brain. Since I don’t have the strength to get out of bed, and I can’t concentrate, I find myself simply staring at the ceiling for periods of time. Very weird.
The toughest thing for me is that I am listening to BYUs opening football game while laying in my bed, rather than sitting in my normal seats in the stadium watching it (at least we are winning…). My boys didn’t have to miss out, though – with the help of some good neighbors and family we got them to the stadium. It has been inspirational to watch family and friends provide such support – everyone is doing something to help – bringing dinner, sending gifts, cards, e-mails, prayers, thoughts. I truly believe that having such a good support system has also been critical to making this week better than it could have been. Things certainly could have been much worse this week.